“Cold as Ice”- Veronica #5


Fastforward to November. I started going out a lot more. I hung out with my classmates from college, my family in Jerzee, and I began working on my winter wardrobe. In the process of finding my own apartment, I met a realtor named Brandon who I started dating. Although he was very attractive, he wasn’t my type – but the intelligence was such a turnon. I’d also hung out with Miguel about 3 more times since our first date. We would either go out or cook at his place-as long as there was food in the equation somewhere. I love to cook, so I’d make him the usual arroz con gandules, pernil, tostones, bacalaitos, all the great Puerto Rican favorites. A few times I’d made Korean beef, macaroni and cheese, and collard greens. Whatever I cooked, he loved. And he loved to watch me cook. I knew he was attracted to me, but I still didn’t think he desired me.
One day as I was cooking a Korean broiled salmon dish with sticky rice that he loved, his sister called. He was honest with her about us dating as he blurted out, “Nah me and V over here chillin, you know how we do.” Oh shit. Well, ok anyway. We refused to tell his mother because she is crazy as fuck. Didn’t need her to get the wrong idea, we were just kicking it. I’d also learned to ignore all the little “baby” and “mami” nicknames he had for me. Remember I said he wasn’t shit? He probably isn’t. But he’d even begun calling me at work a few times a week to make plans for our usual weekend tryst, and to check on me as well. He wasn’t my man but I was happy with whatever we were. I didn’t expect anything from him and he didn’t seem to expect anything from me. And that was okay.

Unbeknownst to everyone, I flew to NC to be with RJ for a weekend. I needed some straight up physical attention and he was the only one that i desired. RJ and I ended up having a fight as soon as I got there, because the bruhs planned a last minute set with their new line. Now RJ’s ass was old as fuck. I couldn’t understand why he needed to leave me on our first night to go run behind some undergraduates.

“Yo V, when the bruhs call, I come running. It’s the bruhs man.”

As soon as he said that I screamed “Well how ’bout you go fuck THE BRUHS cuz u dayum sure won’t be fucking me!”

I spent the rest of the weekend with my two linesisters. Miguel called twice even though he thought I was still in NYC. I left NC without telling RJ goodbye. I got home and had to sit through an hour lecture (in Spanish, of course) from my uncle’s wife about how I need to stop running off and try to find me a man. Whatever. Worry about why my uncle is fucking his secretary and not you.
I ended up staying at Brandon’s house that night. I went the fuck to sleep. My head was hurting and he never bothered me. He never once asked what was wrong, he only asked if he could get me anything. I could get used to this…Until the next morning I noticed something under the bed when I dropped my phone. I picked up a baby rattler toy. Huh?

“Oh yea V, I have 5 kids.”

Ok, when were you going to tell me this?

“Nah my bad Veronica, I don’t bring women around my kids. Besides, my wife and I are separated and I don’t wanna make things difficult.”

Ok hold the phone. 4 sons. Wife. Separated. Difficult. Where the fuck are my keys?!?! I tore out of that apartment so fast, I was out of breath by the time I made it to my car at the end of the block. On the way home I called Monae. I had heard about that fuck nigga who still lives at home with his mama. She understood me more than anyone else because we both ALWAYS had some crazy story about a man and his lies. She didn’t pick up so I knew that she’d turned her phone off, something she does when she’s pissed.
On the way home i was furious, reminded of all the other men who had lied to me, including RJ. Why do men hide the truth? Better yet, why are we expected to overlook and accept certain things JUST to be able to say “I have somebody?” I refuse to be one of these broads who says “yea I’m in a situation” or some other retarded crap. I guess that’s why I refuse to let anyone get close to me. I’d hate to be so caught up that I become blind to my reality after the truth has revealed itself. i’d rather be icy and cold than on some “I’m Going Down” type shit. If it’s meant to be alone, then so be it….

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~ by A. Nicole on October 15, 2009.

6 Responses to ““Cold as Ice”- Veronica #5”

  1. Aye yo V, how he gon come at you like, “You want sumthin ta eat? How was your day? Oh, and by the mufuckin way, I got FI kids!” Fuck outta here…

  2. How the heck did he hide the presence of 5 KIDS??

    No photos? No clothes? No nothing? I aint gotta meet them, but I need to know they exist.

    Release and exit nucca…

  3. Yea and don’t forget about the wife who is still the wife!

  4. Off da subject…y am I ova here hoping u would dedicate a whole paragraph to food? Yea 5 kids is a lil ova the top…I need more attention..them kids would b on daddy lap more than me..yep I gots to GO

  5. Lmao @ hiding five kids… That’s way over the top… RJ dumb as hell… there will always be lines and set night… you were only there for the weekend

  6. Damn five kids and a wife? Fcuk was he on?

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