“Pretty Wings”-Veronica #12

I love summer in NYC. Puerto Rican Day Parade, street festivals, block parties, nutcrackers and free concerts in Central Park, going to Howard Beach, driving with the sunroof open and blasting Jay-Z or reggaeton, all the good stuff. While many of my female friends were excited about summer flings, I on the other hand did not like the idea of men coming and going on purpose. I preferred to stick to my normal routine of Girls Night Out and hanging out with family on the weekend so I wouldn’t be reminded of my 7 week drought. I actually ended up reconnecting with both Malik and RJ before the 4th of July. Malik came over a couple times and RJ called every week. I drove down to VA for a family reunion, and I met up with RJ on my way back to NY for lunch. That spark between RJ and I was turning into a flame when we laid eyes on each other. He was my heart, and he knew it. We reminisced about our early days of dating and eventually parted ways so I could get home at a decent hour. It was a sad ride home as I was unsure as to when I would be able to see him again

Once I got to the NJ Turnpike, my phone rang and knocked me out of my trance. WTF does Miguel want? I answered dryly, and his strange ass was upbeat as hell. The conversation went fine, considering I hadn’t spoken to him in two months. I told him I was headed back to the city after a week in the south, and he said he was headed to work the night shift. We spoke briefly about how we celebrated Independence Day and enjoyed a couple laughs about our intertwining families. He hung up to “allow me to concentrate on driving,” and asked me to call him when I got home. No stanks. He missed me. It was all up and through his voice. That’s fine, maybe he needs to miss me. And I could admit I missed his company. I sent him a text when I got home just to pacify him a little.
Miguel continued to text, I guess he felt the need to explain himself. He said he was having difficulty accepting our friendship, in that we became closer than what he’d expected. He pushed away because he didn’t know what else to do. Miguel said that he realized how immature he is in regards to how he handled "our" situation. My response was “k,” and I know that aggravated him but who cares how he feels. He said that he wanted to be single and date other women without feeling guilty. Somehow dating ME made him feel guilty about wanting to be a male whore, I guess. I assumed that because he'd been tied down to one person most of his life, that he was making up for lost time by seeing all these other chicks. That's how I looked at it, and I didn't question it. Miguel claimed that he didn’t want me involved in his madness, which is him being able to date and fuck whoever. Fuck outta here. No one asked Miguel for anything. Clearly he caught feelings and wasn’t prepared for it. He's been listening to too much fucking Maxwell.

As soon as I got out of the shower, my phone rang. Miguel was on the other line because he "got carpal tunnel from all the texting." He basically reiterated his text messages, and I sat in silence the entire time. When it was my turn to speak, I reminded him that I never expected anything more than friendship. I let him know that he was, in fact, very immature and he had a lot of growing up to do. I kinda spazzed on him, mainly because I had never really told him how angry he'd made me in the past. I didn't get emotional because the hurt had come and gone, but just the thought of him not speaking to me for months was beginning to infuriate me. I reminded him that as both friends and adults, we should be able to tell each other how we are feeling without disappearing for months. He says he understood my point and felt bad, so I said my peace and let that be it. One thing Miguel has yet to understand is that he has no understanding or control over his own emotions. I reminded him of this, and then he decided that hearing how I felt made him more aware of how he treats people. On cue, RJ beeped in. And now, Veronica has moved on……

~ by A. Nicole on December 15, 2009.

2 Responses to ““Pretty Wings”-Veronica #12”

  1. Men always believe everything runs on their schedule. When they need time they take it, when they decide to hop back in you’re supposed to accept it. Like you said “NO STANKS!”

  2. of course. that’s one thing you can look forward to!!

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