Monae~Settle…or Not

My day off consisted of me being stuck inside the house for the most part. It seemed as though a series of mini hurricanes had made its way through Miami and I wanted no parts of the aftermath. So there I was, cuddled up in blankets and fuzzy socks while stuffing my face with leftovers from Houston’s. I don’t remember watching anything after daytime trash tv. My brain was still filled with the uncertainty about James. I glanced at my Blackberry just to catch the LED flash red. I knew it was another message from him. I still hadn’t given him an answer, it was Friday and he was low-key running me down for it. I ignored the calls and bbm’s from him. I needed some breathing room from this thing. I nonchalantly snatched up my phone and sighed heavily until I read the text. It was from an old acquaintance named Aaron. Truth be told, my heart dropped slightly because it wasn’t James but hey, I didn’t need to dwell on that.

Aaron was… can I say….uber BLAH. He was decent looking but his personality was non-existent. A mutual friend tried to play matchmaker and after one date out with him, I could NOT bear to be in his presence any longer. His jokes were dry….he was the only one that found humor from them. I just could not be bothered. He tried to pursue it but I flat out told him that I wasn’t interested and I never heard from him again….until now. Apparently he moved but was in town for the weekend and wanted to see me so he suggested we go out for drinks. I pondered on it….I can always find an excuse to leave early and I didn’t want to be cooped up any longer. I agreed and he sent me the address. It was unfamiliar but after I primped and got myself together, I relied on mapquest and my gps to get me there. I wasn’t too thrilled but I tried to hype myself up in hopes that he had changed…for the better! While on the way, I got a phone call from James which I sent straight to voicemail. I figured I’d deal with him later until I realized the destination’s end….I was right in front of James’ club.

My heart thumped double time and I thought I was being played but then I had to remember that this place was probably recommended to Aaron. I mean the spot WAS hot. I shook my head and thought about leaving but I didn’t want to stand the guy up. I assumed James wouldn’t be there. I found a parking spot and headed to the front of the club. I spotted Aaron walking up and he was looking GOOD. I perked up a bit and thought it may not be so bad a night after all. We exchanged hugs and the usual “It’s been so long’s”. After we got inside, we found seats at the bar and that’s when it all went downhill. He was depressed by a recent break-up and needed someone to talk to…ok fine but when you add depression to someone who can’t hold their liquor, you get a recipe for disaster. He had two damn drinks (martini’s mind you) and was slurring his words and had tears in his eyes. It was a pathetic sight! I tried to be the “consoling friend” and rub his back while he cried into my shoulder. I had a feeling that I was being watched so I looked up and my eyes met with James.

My whole body felt heated and I swear I wanted to push Aaron off of me right at that moment and try to explain but technically I didn’t owe James any of that. I did start to feel antsy about ignoring his calls and my stomach began to drop as he made his way over. I prayed he wouldn’t cause a scene…especially in front of Aaron.

“Hey Monae…..I didn’t expect to see you…tonight.”

I wanted to melt into the floor.

“James….hey. How are things?”

That’s all I could come up with. I was so nervous. He smirked a bit and his eyes shifted over to Aaron who was slumped in his seat.

“I thought you were a better judgment of company Monae….how are things you say? Did you get my calls?”

“Yes….but I….”

“No need to explain. You and your friend have a good night.”

I watched him walk away and blend in with the rest of the club people. Could things go right for me just once?! At this point I was ready to get out of there. Aaron was drunk and I didn’t feel like being the one to deal with that. I called a cab for him and let the bouncer know where to find the wasted guy. While heading to my car, my phone vibrated in my hand. It was James calling. Why was he playing games with me?! I answered and he told me to turn around. I rolled my eyes and did so with a huff. His silent ass car was right up on me. I backed up before my urge to kick the tire became real. He hopped out as if he were reading my thoughts and was beside me in a flash. The intensity in his eyes scared me and he was invading my space. The scent of his cologne was weakening the wall I had partially built.

Mo you gotta stop doing this to me….why would you come on a date with the next man to my club? That fucked with me all night!”

“You’ve gotta be kidding me right?? James in case you’ve forgotten, you are MARRIED! Whatever I do is my damn business!”

“Monae my marriage has been over! I told you the situation! She won’t give me a divorce….what am I supposed to do? Allow her to stop me from living?!”

“All I’m hearing right now are excuses! Separated still means you’re married! And whatever feelings you have for me are still wrong! This whole THING is WRONG!”

“Damn so you trying to make me stop feeling what I feel for you too? I don’t believe this shit man!”

I couldn’t believe we were outside the club arguing like a real damn couple. My blood was BOILING! I’d had enough of his shit for the night and spun around to leave. But before I could take another step his hand was on my arm and I was unable to go.

“Let me go James! I’m sick of this!”

All I remember after that were his lips on mine…..I’m so damn weak for him.


~ by Monae on August 17, 2010.

One Response to “Monae~Settle…or Not”

  1. Ohhh lawd! Close yo legs to married men!!!

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